A common frustration among career-oriented individuals is the balance between work and family. We’ve all considered the concept of work/life balance as a distant potential not currently reachable. I used to think this way. I thought that the missing ingredient to getting to the next level was time.
Family took time as well, so there was a constant battle between who would get it. When I was with my family, I would think about work. How could I get Hill Media Group to the next level? What kind of content is resonating with my YouTube subscribers? I was in my head, processing the possibilities rather than being in the moment with my family. There was an imbalance within me, and I knew it. I wanted more of both of these worlds.
One sobering moment was when my oldest turned thirteen and became a teenager. I laid awake at night realizing that this was the last chapter in his life before adulthood. So much was going to happen during those years and I wanted to be there for it.
Around the same time I read the book “4,000 Weeks,” which had me thinking differently about time. The average lifespan is 4,000 weeks. That sounds like nothing. I would have guessed that I had already been alive for that long. When you start to think about your own lifespan and the fact that you could be more than halfway through it, it’s quite sobering. But at the same time, knowing that I had about 400 weeks until my older three would be adults, I knew I didn’t want to miss any of it.
Since having children, I try to remind myself that they will be adults by the time I’m 55. That is still young, and at that time I can turn up the heat if I want to build something and time is the main requirement.
I have plenty of time for work. Not wanting to miss out on my kids’ activities has forced me to become more productive with my time. I try my best to eliminate things that waste time so I can be as productive as I can with less than the typical 40-hour work week.
A 2021 study by Autonomy found that employees working a four-day week were 20% more productive while reporting higher levels of well-being. While I don’t work a four-day work week, I work about the equivalent of that, and not missing out on family time and activities certainly improves my well-being.
With work, I have had to look at everything to determine if it’s getting me there faster or slowing me down. I could do my work while listening to music, but while the music I listen to helps me work out harder, it actually slows me down with work. If I have an opportunity to enjoy lunch with my wife, I will take the time to do that, but if alone, many times I don’t even stop to eat.
The equivalent of a four-day work week for me looks like focusing on core tasks for a few hours here and there in between family life. Not every week has a lot of activities, and on those weeks, I can get more done. This has also helped me forecast my time better, instead of responding to everything as it comes. My clients don’t expect me to follow any specific schedule; they expect me to produce results.
When I am focused on my family, I am more relaxed, and that gives me more mental bandwidth to solve complex work-related tasks.
There are times when I backslide and let work consume my mind. One minor setback can make me feel like the sky is falling, and all of a sudden work is the only thing I can think about. These days I don’t get stuck in ruts like that for very long.
Uncertainty and lack of control certainly trigger the setbacks. It might be the thought of losing a client or the fact that it’s been some time since I onboarded a new one. My thinking can spiral, leading me to want to batten down the hatches and brace for impact rather than taking a moment to realize there is no immediate threat and that I have plenty of time to make adjustments if needed.
In those moments, it’s a lack of trust in the Lord, who I know has supplied me with every need I have. Remembering that, and returning to thankfulness for what I have, helps to clear me of that mindset that isn’t serving me and can easily distract me from what’s most important.
It’s easy to look at what’s in front of us and see it as something in the way of us getting to the next level. Whatever the motivations might be, we can justify ourselves into a place where we think happiness is found, and that truly affects our output.
If I want to be at everyone’s activities, then I have to get creative with my scheduling and make the most of the work time I have. This has led me to be more productive than I could have ever imagined and has allowed me to achieve goals in both my business and personal life, all because of the constraints.
What would change about your productivity if you viewed family time as fuel for your work rather than competition for it?