Temporary Satisfaction… False idols?

Posted on July 22, 2006 at 12:32 am by Jerad Hill 1 Comment

Why do people get drunk or do drugs? Is the so called fun they had that one night going to be enough to last a life time?

Why do girls dress so inappropriately? Is the attention they get from the wrong kind of guys going to be fulfilling enough to last a life time?

Why do guys go after the girls that dress inappropriately? Is the attraction they have to that look going to last a life time?

Why do we put so much time and effort into our jobs rather then other people? Is that paycheck going to get you what you want and when you have it, will it last a life time?

Why do we spend so much time online cultivating virtual relationships when we all know somebody in real life that needs a REAL friend? Will those comments and blogs last a life time?

Why do we hold in so much of our emotion? What are we afraid of? Are all the times we failed to share something with a willing ear going to build trusting relationships that will last a life time?

I know all of us can think of a hundred situations that fit into this. Why is it that we do the things we do or don’t do for that matter and what drives our decisions? Gives us a good idea of where our hearts are really at doesn’t it.

I feel like people just do not open up about anything anymore. Everybody keeps everything bottled up. Sometimes I feel like I don’t really know anybody. I guess that is part of getting older. The older people get the more they have been through and hurt by it. More hurt leads to more seclusion of emotion. I don’t really think it has so much to do with getting older as it does with culture. Culture is changing, people lead to busy of lives to pay as close attention to their kids as earlier generations. As a result the kids who are not grown up and entering adulthood have no concept of how to share emotionally with others. Don’t get me wrong, Im not looking for everybody to pour their hearts out to each other for no reason, just those who consider each other friends or maybe even someone you are dating.

What are you holding on to? If its any of the above or something you could relate to it then there is an issue of idolatry. You might say, how does the way I dress or how I share my emotions make me a idolator?

The word idolatry comes from the Greek word eidololatria, a compound of eidolon, “image” or “figure”, and latreia, “worship”. When you care so much about how you are looked at by others you are idoling the opinion of other people. You seek that affirmation that you are desireable so you dress in a way that gets you instant affirmation. You have others in your life that care about you but you do not share your emotions or feelings with them. Your idol in that case is whatever fear is holding you back from cultivating real relationships with people. Your decision to go out and party one weekend is idolatry in the sense that you care more about self gratification then you do about self image. The list can go on…

Why do guys go after girls who dress inappropriately? Is it to make up for their own insecurities?

Why do so many dating couples act so inappropriately in public? Is public display so important to them that they take away everything they could show off in public after they marry?

Maybe Im old fashion or something…

I guess we all have our idols and it’s hard to avoid getting caught up in something to the point where it becomes an issue. For those who do not know Christ then I guess it’s not even an issue at all but for those who know Jesus Christ as their Lord and Saviour it is an issue. Where is your faith? Is your faith in what is relevant to you in whatever your present state is or even in where you are trying to get in life? Is it in your stuff, things you want to attain, or status you want to reach?

Take a step back from your “stuff” in life and look at where you are at in relation to everything around you. If Jesus Christ is not your reason for being part of something, acting a certain way, or seeking after certain things then you need to realign yourself with what God does want for your life. There is to much love and grace out there that is given to you so freely. Why not remove some of the blinders you have allowed to get put on you so you can see God’s true glory.

Much love…

Jerad

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Deena

First of all — Hello Jerad! Please allow me to introduce myself online… I’m Deena, the goofball that keeps making a pest of herself at the most odd times! Like pointing at you when you’re walking out of Chevy’s in the middle of the afternoon and then, blanking out on what your name is… or saying something dorky while over in the YAC on a Sunday morning. If I didn’t know God’s Love for me, I’d be even more worried that I’ve made a horrible first impression, but as I get OLDER and as relatively new believer, hmm… I’m learning to let those things I guard and worry about go… just give them to God… let him use me. And if I’m a goofball, a pest, dorky or have made a bad impression so be it. So what if you think I’m nuts. I truly doubt that God would put you in my path, quite literally, without a reason.

Anyhow, I’ve been meaning for sometime now to say something… I hope this is that time. I enjoy reading what you write. I suppose I’ve been an online lurker for about 4 or 5 months… blogging is such a new concept to me, but that’s another story. Often, I agree with what you’ve said and I think you bring up some very valid points.

Certainly, the issues regarding the way one dresses has an effect far beyond what any of us might realize for both guys and girls.

I’d like to share from yet another , somewhat different perspective. Recently, I was told I looked frumpy in most of my “everyday clothes” and that it would be nice if I’d wear something “cute” or “feminine” every now and then. Now, I have to admit that’s not exactly what a gal wants to hear, especially when she’s trying on new outfits in a women’s clothing store, but since it came from my very best friend in the flesh and the guy I’m soon to marry, I need to take his words seriously. (Note: We’ve been engaged a long time… over 5 years… so it wasn’t that he meant it in a mean or hurtful way nor did I take it that way… once the initial shock wore off that he said that out loud in public in front of a bunch of women I’ll never see again… ha)!

So, back to dress… there’s so much that could be said for the inappropriate clothing that I suppose somewhere along the way… I’ve thought, I shouldn’t dress too “cute” or revealing or whatever it is that my guy enjoy seeing me dressed in… like a nice dress instead of jeans and a t-shirt. Not that my guy wants me to flaunt or be showy… he was talking more along the lines of me gracefully showing my curves and wearing colors, prints and/or fabrics that are not from my Great Aunt Edna or something! On the other hand, when I go shopping… I have to wonder what on earth are these clothing designers or manufacturing companies really THINKING!??? I wouldn’t be caught dead something like that… and so over time (I guess about the past year or so), I’ve selected clothing that’s placed me in the generic, old lady with no style category. In a way, I went out of balance (toward idolatry) via the opposite of inappropriate. I went toward the extreme by lacking in a reasonable fashionable appearance. I didn’t do this intentionally and if my guy hadn’t said anything… I wonder… after time, would he think that another woman was better because she was dressing the way he’d like me to dress? In some ways, I let myself go and in other ways, my dress code had become predictable by what I wasn’t willing to wear (skipping the inappropriate clothes and accepting the old lady look not to mention how difficult it is to find something even halfway between okay and frumpy in my size), but there’s another part to this issue. How our society has allowed clothing designers and manufacturers to create the standards. If girls keep buying the inappropriate clothing they’ll keep making it. If the media keeps showing us what to wear, etc… and the list goes on and on! Now, I’m not defending the girls that dress inappropriately nor do I advocate that one should dress like an old lady… ha… either way is idolatry. Yes, each of us has a choice to make (right or wrong) in every action we take, but what if the only thing left on the clothing rack is a skimpy crop top or pair of blue jeans short-shorts? Is that what we buy or do we call up Great Aunt Edna and ask her for a few hand me downs? Maybe we shopping online the next day (yep, delay that sense of gratification from mall shopping) instead of buying that frumpy or inappropriate outfit? The thought of shopping online when I can’t find something in the store never entered my mind until a few days ago when my mom wanted me to look at a mother of the bride dress for her online. What a concept… I’m truly old-fashioned in my shopping ability.

Now, about the whole idea of sharing or opening up or keeping things bottled up inside. I think age plays a factor in how one shares and sure, our culture is just so BUSY that when do we have a moments peace (I suppose Sunday at church for most folks, at least that’s what statistics show), but I also think it’s lack of obedience to God’s will for us.

For instance, what if in your daily activites, you run into an old friend from grammar school and they’re happy to see you, but hestitant to say they’re going through a bad time right now and you’re in such a rush that you miss recognizing those needs or emotions. Did you miss an opportunity to be used by God to be a witness? Maybe, maybe not… only God knows for sure. You mention cultivating online relationships via blogging compared to the in REAL life actions we could take. I’d never knock the info age or technology, because somewhere out there in our big world, maybe there’s someone that’s been reading your blog or maybe an email from a mere acquaintance arrived just at the right moment and now that person has been saved, born again and now knows Jesus Christ as their Lord and Saviour… so that’s a wonderful use of tech! But how far will some people go, or maybe even avoid having a real in the flesh relationship or friendship? The kind where you can tell that person positively anything… even say something to the one you love… like “frumpy” and not have it be a bad thing! Or maybe it’s sharing about how being accountable for your actions or making a difference in your community — how are you really sharing? One thing I’ve come to know is that when I raise my hand to volunteer, it has little to do with me (sometimes, I’m not even sure how that happens) and everything to do with God. He’s working through me to create a significant difference in his kingdom. Maybe he’s placed me there for a strategic purpose?

I think more often than not, insecurities and fear cause many people to clam up or avoid sharing. I know I’ve been in both shoes… the one desperately needing someone to talk to and very fearful of sharing and the one that’s been in such a big rush that it was all I could do to get out of the conversation. I know I don’t want to be judged for what I might have done in the past and especially, if right now things are bad, it’s really hard to just say things aren’t so good. On the other hand, maybe things are really going great and you want to share all your good news and excitement with everyone you come in contact with, but someone that’s having a real bad time of it feels even more lonely or depressed upon hearing it because they have no good news and they haven’t had any excitement or happiness in years.

In either case, whether one is in a burdensome trial or enjoy great news, know this… God’s Love is an open invitation and God’s assignments offer character building transforming our hearts to become more like Jesus.

Do you accept God’s invitation or assignment? Will you wear the “cute” outfit to the picnic or the frumpy one? Will you wear an inappropriate outfit… thinking it won’t hurt… just this once… to Starbucks on Friday night so that maybe one of those guys will talk to you instead of your friend? Will you be the one that needs to open up to a friend and do it obediently? Maybe you’ve been in a rush for months and need to take time for a friend or two or more, will you?

Hey, maybe someone that reads this will be the one to design clothes that are stylish, yet not inappropriate for all sizes. I’ve enjoyed sharing… maybe I’ll take a chance to share again in the future.